Wisconsin Sober Story: Zack H
Zack Horne: @zhorne10
This is an AF MKE project. We share sober stories from Wisconsinites - follow here.
How long have you been alcohol-free or trying to be alcohol-free? What’s your sober date?
I have been sober for 9 years - since February 1st, 2014.
What helped you see that you needed or wanted to quit drinking? What helped you make that choice?
My girlfriend at the time broke up with me because of my drinking and that woke me up enough to see that drinking was consuming my life and projecting a version of myself that I didn’t like. Ironically, I was drinking because I didn’t like myself and was uncomfortable in my own skin. Self-acceptance is what helped me make the choice to quit drinking - in order to be my true self, I needed to quit drinking. Then, I was able to surrender my drinking to God and I’ve been sober ever since.
For what reason(s) did you quit drinking alcohol?
I quit drinking because I didn’t like the person I’d become. The things I was doing while I was drunk are things that I never would have done sober. I was sick of living with this constant shame of my behavior, but I couldn’t stop. Once I stopped I was able to do the hard work of looking inward to discover the trauma that I was avoiding and make the changes necessary to be a better person.
How did living in Wisconsin impact your experience quitting drinking?
At first, I found it difficult to get sober in Wisconsin. I was 24 when I stopped drinking and most of my friends were still partying. At AA meetings, I was usually the youngest in the room and couldn’t find people my age who were sober. When most activities were going out and partying, I stayed away for a while until I was more comfortable in my sobriety to hang out at a bar. As the years went on, I was comfortable hanging out in a bar, and now most bars I go to have a variety of NA options, including my personal favorite Athletic Brewing Company.
What are two things you would tell your old self about alcohol now?
The best part of your life will start once you stop drinking.
Alcohol may appear to cover up bad feelings, but it will numb the good feelings too. The only way out of it is through.
What do you enjoy most about alcohol-free living?
I enjoy having the energy to do things and not dealing with hangovers ruling my day. I really enjoy working out and trail running and I wouldn’t be in the shape I’m in now if I was still drinking.
What are the biggest benefits for you of living alcohol-free?
The biggest benefit for me is having control over my life. I was chained to alcohol and it consumed everything in my life. I have my life back and I don’t have to plan my day around when I will get my next drink.
What would you say to someone who is new to quitting drinking or is sober-curious?
It may feel like an impossible task, but if you take it day by day, you will build the momentum you need and can build a life of freedom from alcohol. You also don’t have to worry about the stigma that may come from being an alcoholic or sober. Thankfully, it is much more common to be sober than it was when I started and you have so many great NA options available to you. Another thing I would add is that your sobriety journey will always be unique to you. The best thing you can do is find out what works for you to stay sober. For some people that is abstaining from non-alcoholic alternatives and that’s fine. Some people can have a non-alcoholic beer and not put themselves at risk of wanting an alcoholic one. Some people need AA meetings regularly while others don’t. All that matters is that you stay sober and do no harm to others.
Any tips on making friends without drinking?
Find an activity you enjoy and make friends there. I’d say one of the most important things to do when you first get sober is to fill your time with other activities and hobbies. I was fortunate that I had a great group of friends who were very supportive of my decision to stop drinking. And yes, you will lose some friends along the way once you stop. There are always a few drinking buddies you will inevitably cut ties with in order to work on your sobriety, and that’s okay. Real friends will stand by you and won’t make you feel uncomfortable with your choice.
What is your favorite thing to do in MKE?
There are so many great things to do in Milwaukee. One of my favorite things is to check out local restaurants with my wife. I also enjoy catching a show at one of our great local theaters, and, of course, going to Buck’s games at Fiserv.
Want to Connect with Zack?
Use code ZACKH20 for a discount on Athletic Brewing!
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